Cruftbox: My Box of Cruft

The new year is underway and I hope you all make the most of it.
I finished up 2006 with a few fun things.

On Saturday, Zoe and I went to play some Dungeons & Dragons at a neighbor’s house. I had forgotten how long it can take to get though even a few encounters.

Zoe had a good time and I think it may become a regular activity to keep the campaign moving along. We only got through making characters and two fights before having to call it quits for the day.
Why did we quit? Well, we had to go work on the South Pasadena Rose Parade Float. South Pas is one of the only communities that still builds thier own float with volunteer effort.

From lunch to dinner, we helped “pick”, meaning sitting at tables preparing the flowers to be glued and stuck onto the float. Endless bundles of carnations and roses passed through our hands.

Another whole crew was dedicated to the work on the float. Next year we’re likely to spend even more time helping.

Several weeks ago I was walking down Mission Street in South Pasadena when I spotted a table of old books outside an antique store. The sign said “$1 each” so I took a look. I picked up four books that looked interesting and was on my way.

When I showed them to Michele, she rolled her eyes. “What are you going to do with those?” she asked.
Well, I read them.
The four books are:
Life of Johnson by Lord Macaulay, published 1895
Lord Macaulay wrote this long essay about the famous English author Samuel Johnson. The most likely line of Johnson’s you may have heard is “Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel. ” HunterThompson used the line “He who makes a beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man.” in several of his books as well.
The essay basciallly talks about Johnson’s life and struggles. Evidently, while Johnson was quite witty, he was also quite repulsive in appearance and behavior. I tried to follow along with the full essay, but Macaulay’s oft references to timely British people that I have no clue about got old quick.
Basically Johnson was a good and witty writer, but not a guy you wanted to have a beer with in person.
An Outline of the English Reformation by Bishop Frank Wilson, published 1950
Bishop Wilson of Eau Claire goes to great length to clear up the misconception that the Anglican/Episcopal church split off from the Catholic Church simply to allow Henry VIII to get divorced. He goes on into great detail on the subject. As neither an Anglican nor a Catholic, it seems like they had quite long history of being mad at each other. According to Bishop Wilson, the Pope, the Spanish, and the French have done a lot of bad things to the British people, including the fact that James II hung out quite a bit trying to be king. Also, he points out that the troublesome Puritain’s getting the boot was key to the Anglican’s Reformation. Of course, the Puritains and the Pilgrims (another Anglican rival group) ended up in America with their harsh religious beliefs leading to the American culture of today where a naked breast on TV during the Superbowl is is cause for a complete freakout.
To summarize the book, the Anglicans put up with a load of crap from everyone (mainly the Pope’s friends) and are quite happy with the Archbishop of Canterbury, so why don’t you all stop talking about Henry VIII’s divorce already.
The Odyssey by Homer, translated by Butcher & Lang, published 1900
This is the first time I really read the Odyssey from front to back. The story of Odysseus’s encounters with the Cyclops, Poseidon, Circe, and the rest of the more famous adventures were well known to me. But what surprised me was that about half the book was spent after all that as Odysseus returns to Ithaca and plans to deal with the suitors, called in this translation ‘the wooers’. I like the terms ‘wooers’ better.
Homer goes to great length to show how bad the suitors are and gives them lots of chances to prove that they are not bad guys, but they don’t. Odysseus reminds the wooers they are bad men in a long speech and then kills them all, and the handmaids that consorted with the wooers, and anyone else being nice to the wooers. When the wooers get to the Underworld, Achilles and the other dead veterans of the Trojan War ask the wooers what happened and the wooers explain that they acted poorly and Odyssues killed them all. Then the kinsmen of the wooers are bit peeved that Odysseus killed all the wooers and confront Odysseus. Odysseus starts killing the kinsmen of the wooers (surprise!) and doesn’t stop until Pallas Athena stops by and tells Odysseus to stop.
Not a bad tale, but due to the poetical nature of the story, many lines are repeated like “Odysseus of many counsels” instead of just Odysseus. Also, there is much mention of people’s fathers and mothers, like “Eurycleia, daughter of Ops son of Peisenor” that is all bit a confusing to a non-Greek Scholar
The Poetical Works of Robert Burns, published 1856
Robert Burns is viewed as Scotland’s greatest poet, equivalent to Shakespeare in stature. His most famous poem, Auld Lang Syne, is sung ever New Year’s Eve at the stoke of Midnight. You know it. It starts with “Should old acquaintance be forgot, and never brought to mind?”
I didn’t read every line of the book. Burns was a prolific writer. I read various poems here and there.

The amzing thing about this book was that it was printed in 1856.

Yep, it’s 150 years old and I bought it for a dollar. Good deal if you ask me.
I do like his poetry. He wrote about everything, big and small. From the future of Scotland to a good pub he liked. With such poems as Address to the Toothache and To A Louse, On Seeing One On A Lady’s Bonnet, At Church it’s hard not to like the guy.
In summary, my $4 was well spent.

This year we served a turkey for Christmas Dinner. As is my way, the turkey was brined for maximum flavor and moistness.
I learned about brining turkeys from Alton Brown a few years ago. His recipe is good, but after a few years of tracking down all the ingredients, I have slimmed down the recipe dramtically. Basically, it’s the sugar and salt doing most of the work and the assorted flavors are generally lost IMHO.
You must brine a turkey a day in advance. If you are reading this an hour before the turkey needs to go into the oven, you are out of luck.
Turkey Brine
(for ~20 lb turkey)
1 cup kosher salt
1 cup brown sugar
2 quart vegetable stock
1 teaspoon Old Bay seasoning
1 teaspoon ground black pepper
5-6 pounds of ice
Boil up all the ingredients until the salt and sugar are completely dissolved. Add ice to chill down the brine until ice still floats in the pot.
It should look like this:

Next prepare the container to hold the turkey in. This year I used the Turkey Brining Bag by Grill Friends/Elizabeth Karmel. Elizabeth’s invention is great and worked wonderfully. The bag lets you use less brine and make less of a mess. If you don’t have a brining bag, you can use a large pot, big enough to hold a turkey.

Place the washed and empty turkey in the bag/pot (you did save the giblets didn’t you?). I resused a styrofoam box to hold the bag.

Pour the bring over the bird. Then put the rest of the ice in. You want the turkey submerged and cold.
You can put it in the fride if you have space or if you have a styrofoam box you can put it in the laundry room and make sure the ice isn’t melting.
Let the turkey bathe for a day and night until you are ready to cook it.

You did keep the giblets right? And do get permission to use them from She-who-is-in-charge-of-holiday-planning because sometimes the giblets are used for stuffing or gravy purposes.
Boil that heart, gizzard, and liver up!

Then present the holiday treat to your dog. Here, you see Piper ready to feast.

After brining, pull out the turkey and get it ready to cook. Don’t rinse it. Here I am stuffing the turkey.
Good luck and let me know how it goes for you.