August 13, 2006
Zoom Movie Review

My oh my the things we do for our children.

Yesterday I took the girls to see the movie Zoom, about a group of young superheroes. I should have done a little research before heading out to the theater and avoided the movie.

The movie is basically a set of product placements strung together with a few music videos stretched out to 83 minutes. The product placement is so blatant, that characters actually visit a Wendy's restaurant and discuss how much they like Wendy's food how eager they are to get some. Heck, there's even a robot character named Mr. Pibb.

Worse probably is the fact that we only get to see the young heroes use their power once or twice. Truly disappointing, even for children. Actors Tim Allen, Courteney Cox, Chevy Chase, and Rip Torn are pretty much wasted talent with this script.

The waste of acting effort and my tickes can be entirely blamed on a lackluster script tha must have been computer generated by a studio exec. Let's see Star Talent + Cute Kids + Super Powers = Profit. Too bad they forgot to add in a Good Story.

Posted by michael at August 13, 2006 10:20 AM


If you want a true feel good family film, I recommend renting "Secuestro Express." Venezuelan with English subtitles. It will:
a) help your kids improve their reading skills
b) teach them the importance of not getting too high when clubbing in Latin America
c) explain why girls should never trust a boyfriend who refuses to marry you after 2 years

Posted by: Isabel [http://www.clownpenis.fart] on August 13, 2006 10:12 PM

Waitaminnit............. Don't you work for Disney?!?!!??!!?!?

(Hi, Isabel! How's the anger management coming along?)

Posted by: t-b0ne [http://teledildonics.cum] on August 18, 2006 10:33 PM

The movie is basically a set of product placements

Look down the page to your post titled "Jelly Belly Sweet Rocks" and then help yourself to a heaping helping of STFU.

Posted by: rodan [] on August 18, 2006 10:38 PM

i haven"t saw it but maybe tomorrow i will!!! i"m sure the movie is great

Posted by: SILVIQ [] on September 2, 2006 7:47 AM
Post a comment